MAXIMILIANO OMG

Hello, Blog Readers! 

I hope you are all doing well. I sure am! :)

This week was an amazing one because I got to see my Chilean host brother, Maxi, again after two whole years! He is currently an exchange student in Germany and came to Paris with the Rotary Euro-Tour.  But I will tell you about that in detail when I get to that day of the week hahah.

On Monday, the interesting thing that I did was go to get lunch with my German friend, Bianca. Bianca was one of my close friends in my French classes and I have always liked hanging out with her because she is an interesting person and we get to practice our French together. We got sandwiches and caught up and it was a lovely way to spend the early afternoon before work, so that was nice!

On Tuesday I had one of my important Sally-Needs-To-Keep-Learning-French-Words Mornings. This means that I went to a little cafe and read in French for three hours and looked up all the words I didn’t know the exact meaning of. It was kinda rainy outside so I was content in that cafe with my books and coffee. I try to do that at least once every week because I think it is good for me!

Nowww for Wednesday! Well, on Wednesday afternoon, I met up with a new au pair friend named Marlene who I had only talked to a bit on Facebook. We found each other when I posted in an au pair group asking if there were other au pairs who don’t work on Wednesday afternoons who would like to meet up with me because all my friends work that day, and she responded ot my post! I wasn’t sure what she would be like, but I was certainly not dissapointed with this new friend I had made! She showed me an adorable cafe I had never been to before, and we sat there until it closed, getting to know each other and talking about our lives in Paris. Once the cafe had closed, we weren’t ready to say goodbye, so we walked our way all through the center of Paris and arrived at the Eiffel Tower at around 7:30pm (we had met up at 3:30pm so it was a long time to be walking hahah). I had planned to meet up with Maxi on Thursday morning, but earlier that Wednesday, I had recieved a message from him saying that he and all the other exchange students would be at the Eiffel Tower on Wednesday evening. He didn’t have wifi, so I couldn’t get more information on where to meet him or what time, but I was so determined to meet him that I figured I could just walk around until I saw a bunch of teenagers with flags taking pictures which would CLEARLY mean I had found him. Marlene didn’t have anywhere else to be and we had so thoroughly enjoyed our afternoon together that she decided to help me find Maxi. We walked back and forth under the Eiffel Tower until we were too hungry and had to stop and get sandwiches.

 

I thought it wouldn’t be that hard to find them, but there were so many different groups of students that it began to seem impossible. At about 8:30, Marlene went home (I really didn’t blame her hahahah it seemed like a hopless cause) and I kept on walking around with all the tourists, looking for my Maxi. Then I saw him. I saw my Chilean host brother and it didn’t feel real. He was huddled in a group with other exchange students, taking a picture. I walked towards him as their group huddle fell apart, and Maxi turned towards me and we made quick eye contact but he didn’t recognize me and he turned away to take a picture with his phone so I walked up close enough to be IN the picture. When he felt some stranger standing so close to him, he turned around to see WHO I WAS AND WHAT I WANTED and I got to see his beautiful face melt from utter confusion into pure joy and it made me so happy I could have cried. He threw his arms around me and started yelling things in Spanish and German and whatever language happiness is, because it was one of the best moments ever and we couldn’t have dreamt of it being that good. 

All the other exchange students in his district were confused. They didn’t know who I was or where I came from or what I meant to Maxi, but they saw we were happy and we all smiled at each other. I hung out with Maxi and his district until very late that night, and even went up the Eiffel Tower with them! I begged Maxi to keep speaking in Spanish with me even though his English had really improved in Germany and I used a lot of words in French in my Spanish sentences hahaha. There were other Chileans in his district, and hearing them use “po” and “me tinca” and “weon” made me feel so warm and at home! That night was wild and exciting for me. Maxi and I stuck together the entire time, blabbering on about our memories and inside sibling jokes and hugging every half hour because neither of us could believe that we were together in Paris! Eventually, the American exchange students realized I spoke English and that I am also American and they asked me all sorts of questions and all ended up being super lovely people. I didn’t end up getting back home to Asnieres until about 1:00am, and I went right to sleep when I got home because I had promised to meet up with all of them early the next morning.

So on Thursday morning, I got up at 6:30 so I could leave by 7:20 and find their hotel by 8:30, and finding the hotel went very smoothly. Except for when I needed to ask a military man for directions and when I tried to speak French, Spanish just kept spilling out! The man was patient and understanding and we even laughed together over my language problems, and I ended up finding the hotel in time, stoked that my Spanish had come back so strongly! Together with Maxi and the other students, we all headed off to Sacre-Coeur for the morning as a group and after that the exchange students were given free time for the rest of the day. A lot of them had their own plans, but when they heard that I was going to give Maxi a super-walking-tour of the city, quite a few of them decided to join us! I made them walk sooooo much hahah but they really did see a lot! We rode the metro from Sacre-Coeur to Arc du Triomphe and then walked all the way down through the Tulieres Gardens to the Louvre before walking over to Notre Dame, eating, and then taking the metro to the Opera. When we got to the Opera House, it was time for me to head to work. I said bye to Maxi, and it was kind of a bummer, but I was so happy that I had gotten to see him in the first place that I mostly just felt grateful. I have the best Chilean brother in the universe and he loves me just as much as I love him and his entire family and I can’t believe I found a connection like that with people who come from such a different place than I do. Traveling is a magical experience and humans and life are so darn interesting hahaha. 

The rest of Thursday I was soooooo exhausted. I had barely slept the night before and I had walked all over Paris and my body felt so heavy! Luckily, Prune was really nice and listened to me and didn’t make work difficult.

On Friday morning, I didn’t run. I didn’t get out of bed until 10, and when i got up go get breakfast my legs and feet hurt so much and I still felt so sleepy that I just got back in bed and rested up before work. I needed a day like that, and I was proud of my mind for not guilting my body into going on adventures it couldn’t handle that day hahaha. 

Friday ended up being a very nice day, anyways. It was warm outside and the sky was blue and that evening, Prune and I had a picnic in the backyard for dinner with Eden! 

Saturday morning I got up super early to go sourvenir shopping for my friends and family. I had held off on buying gifts for everyone until the end of my year here, and since all my friends were busy that morning I decided it would be a good time to get that done! 

I came back home for lunch before heading off to a cafe to meet up with Chloe, a girl I will be going to London with in the end of June! I had been planning on going to London the third weekend of June when I saw that Chloe had posted in an au pair group asking if anyone wanted to go to London with her the same weekend I had planned on going. We began to message each other to plan on how to buy tickets and what-not, when I looked at her picture and realized that she was one of the au pair girls that my mom had met while we were waiting in line for the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam! Sooooo basically this whole London thing was meant to be hahah. We met up to get coffee and buy our bus and hostel tickets together, just to make sure we did everything right. I don’t know Chloe very well, but she seems very sweet and I think our trip to London is going to be really fun!

Saturday evening we had some neighbors over for dinner, and I got to help by cutting up all the fruit to be dipped in chocolate fondu for dessert. The guests were very nice people who I hadn’t met before. They asked me lots of questions and were always trying to bring me into the conversations in a way no other guests we have had in my experience here had before, and this gave me a very high opinion of them. This gave me the impression that they were very comfortable in their own skin, and I liked that. They were also very funny! Cecile and Fred had prepared a yummy meal, but after the appetizer, dinner, and cheese course it was 12:30am and I was too sleepy to care about dessert, so I did some cleaning, excused myself, and went to sleep. 

Now it is Sunday morning and I have actually finished this post quite early for it is only 11:18am! Today I am going to meet up and do something with Marlene in Paris. We had planned on running together this morning, but we both ended up having late nights and called that off hahah. I don’t know what we will do, but I bet it will be fun! 

Okay. That is all for now. Tell you guys more next week!

Picnics and Versailles

Well, well, well. It is a rainy sunday afternoon and I am home alone and all I really want to do is be calm and drink tea. The wonderful thing is that THAT is exactly what I am doing right now and it is so very peaceful. I made chocolate chip cookies yesterday, so the house smells like deliciousness, and I can hear the ocasional car rolling through the puddles outside — a sound I have decided I enjoy. 

This week has been a strange because I have had LOTS of free time and I have actually found ways to make use of that time hahaha. This is a good thing! On Tuesday morning, I decided to skip my run and just do as much resting as possible before work. I had a pretty terrible blister on my ankle from the three former long days of walking in Paris that made shoes and socks and even bandaids quite painful, and that certainly contributed to my unathletic decision. I was excited to have a day to be lazy! It had been over a month and a half since I had had a long quiet morning, so I decided to do lots of quiet acitivities that would make me feel somewhat refreshed. I got up around nine, and ate my breakfast slowly while reading in French (because feeling like I was falling behind in French would certainly not be relaxing). I then did a lot of laundry and cleaned and organized my room. Then I watched the news in French for a little, read in English a little, and then looked up different tickets to plan out the two last little weekend trips of my European adventure. This day was important for me because I needed a day like that hahah. To be alone and get some simple things done and not talk much. The rest of the day was pretty normal! I went and got Prune from school and we played at the park, came home and ate dinner, and then she went to sleep. I felt good after that day. I felt ready to make more plans hahaha. 

On Wednesday after work I met at a Starbucks with a German girl named Marie to discuss a birthday party that we will be working at together. One of Prune’s friends is having a birthday party the first of June and her mother asked me if I could attend it with Prune (and another au pair of my choice) to make a little extra money and make three hours of her life a lot easier. All of my close au pair friends are scheduled to work the day of the party, so I posted in an au pair group on Facebook about the party and got lots of replies but ended up choosing Marie, because she seemed super nice! I wanted to meet up with her before the party to make sure she actually is nice in real life, and OH MY GOODNESS she is incredibly sweet and interesting. We had planned to meet up for about a half hour just to get to know each other, but we ended up talking for a little over an hour! She was an au pair two years ago, but now she is living in Paris with her boyfriend and producing an album with a French producer because she sings and plays guitar! So she was pretty cool. I am pretty excited to work the birthday party with her hahah and we might even hang out a bit before I go back to California! 

Thursday was a pretty simple day. I woke up, went for a nice long run in the warm rain, and then headed out to Paris to spend late morning reading in French and looking up every word I didn’t completely understand. Now that my French lessons have finished, I am trying very hard to keep learning on my own, and I spent at least three hours doing so on Thursday. When I headed home for lunch that day, I felt proud of myself and decided I had passed a productive morning. :D

On Friday after my little morning run, I headed out to central Paris with Anastazja to take some pictures! She had just got a new camera and wanted me to be her model. I realized I am pretty camera shy, but she did her absolute best to make me as comfortable as possible, and she is a very talented photographer! We spent the morning laughing and catching up. Anastazja is one of the sweetest people I have ever met and I still cannot believe I found her here. She is one of the biggest reasons that I actually learned French, sure, but she is also just so open-minded, supportive, fun, and understanding. Ugh. I love her! Reallyyyyyy. :) 

Now. Saturday was a big day. Saturday was the most picnickiest day ever! I got up early and made chocolate chip cookies to bring to the three picnics I had planned on attending. It was 25 degrees Celsius outside (which is pretty warm for Paris in May) so everyone was making plans to meet in parks and enjoy the not-freezing-ness. The first picnic I went to was in the park where I used to run with Cecile on Wednesdays during Prune’s horseback riding classes. The park is situated in Genvilliers (which is right next to Asnieres) so it was a good place for me to meet up with Anastazja and her friends from high school! I had never met Anastazja’s friends before, but she had talked about them, and they were both two very lovely girls. We spent a couple hours sharing the food we had prepared for each other and playing (or trying to play) badminton in the wind hahaha. It was so pretty and sunny outside and the sky was blue with puffy white clouds and I meant to take pictures but I kept forgetting and I am sorryyyy! 

After that picnic, I went home to grab the rest of the cookies for the other two picnics, and headed off to picnic number two, at a huge park in Paris! This time I had plans to meet up with my Iranian friend Moein and some of his French, Polish, and Morrocan friends. All of the give-or-take 26 year old Morrocan guys were ingeneers by day and muscians by night, and I couldn’t help but think that just about everyone I know in California would have loved to be at that picnic hahah. I was introduced to some interesting music in Arab and asked lots of questions about my future in French, English, and Spanish. It was certainly and interetaining time. It was also really nice to see Moein again, and I need to hang out with him more often. 

Finally, the plan for my third picnic was to meet up with Jess and Maira at the Luxembourg Gardens to eat a bit and then take advantage of the one night of the year where all the museums in Europe are free for everyone! A lot of museums in Paris are free for students, but not all of them, so we picked out two super pricey museums to check out, knowing the lines would be long. Maira was not able to make it, but at the first museum Jess’s friend Camille joined us. It turns out that Camille is from San Francisco and is half Chilean, so we spent a lot of the evening scolding Jess for not having introduced us before hahah. We walked around in the Luxembourg Museum for awhile, checking out different paintings, and you know, doing museum stuff. Camille had to leave early because she had made other plans, and so I gave her some cookies for the road and she was pretty stoked because they “smelled like home.” The plan had been to go to the first museum, then have a picnic, and then go to the second museum, but while we were in the first museum it started to rain, so instead we got some sandwhiches. The second museum we went to was the Museum of Chinese Decoration and it made me feel like I was back at CTTB hahah. There were lots of Buddahs everywhere! We walked around while chatting and saw lots of pretty vases and interesting fabrics and also a really awesome statue of the happiest horse in the world. We were both exhausted because we had done lots that day, so at 11 we decided to head home to get some rest before the trip to Versailles we had planned for Sunday.

Aaaaand, you know, today is Sunday. SO this morning I woke up, ate some breakfast, packed a lunch, and took off to meet Jess on the train to Versailles. The line to get into the actual castle was super long, so we decided to just explore the gardens. For a couple of hours we walked around admiring the symetrical French style gardens under our polkadotted umbrellas. It was raining but it was warm out, so we enjoyed ourselves. We had a picnic by a fountain when the rain stopped for a good half hour. While we walked around, we talked about what if would have been like to be in that garden hace mucho tiempo, and thanks to our big imaginations, it was quite entertaining. Versailles is sort of known for being a huge waste of money (at least that is what we were taught in AP Euro) and I thought a lot about that while we were there. It was SO big. It was so over-the-top and yes, it was beautiful, but it was also dissapointing hahah. There is so much space there! Agh. 

I am still super glad I went though, especially with Jess. We were both kinda tired from the day before and from all the garden-walking, so on the train ride back to Paris I read while she listened to music. On that train ride I felt glad to have a friend who was willing to let me read hahah. That is a special little kind of close, you know?

 

So that is what my week was like, in a nutshell. This probably wasn’t the most interesting blog ever but I hope you enjoyed it anyways. :)

Paris with the Belgians

So I have been back in Paris for a week now, and it feels pretty great to be home. Home is a term, of course, that I use quite loosely, but I have decided that you know when you are home when everything smells like it should. I say this because other than finally having internet and being able to sleep in the bed I have gotten used to over the last eight and a half months, one of the biggest things that jumped out at me as FAMILIAR was how everything here smells just like my year in France. The kitchen smells like brioche and my room smells like Christmas and the livingroom kinda smells like dog but also kinda smells like Prune’s shampoo and all of these smells are the right ones hahaha. I am home and my nose knows it. :D

Going without internet for three weeks was somewhat eye-opening and refreshing, but since I have been back I have definitely been enjoying the luxery of being able to talk to whoever I want to, whenever I want to (within reason and, of course, minding the 9 hour time difference between France and California aaaand the 5 hour time difference between France and Chile). I spent the first half of this past week talking to as many friends as I could, just catching up and helplessly scrambling for the words to express what they all mean to me and how often I think about them. I woke up early and stayed up late just to talk to different friends, and it was so worth it. While in Italy I realized that most of the people I adore probably have no idea exactly HOW much I adore them and how much they impress and inspire me, so I did my best to remind them that I am just over here cheering them on as I live out my own adventures, and I think they got the idea. I mean I guess I can only hope so. A lot of the time I wish I could just unzip my entire soul and existence and let a friend step inside and say “do you see now?! Do you see how much I admire you?” but that isn’t an option so Skype calls for now are the best I can do.

Other little fun things I did during the week included getting coffee with Alessandra in the weird cafe near Campus Langues. I hadn’t seen her for awhile and she wanted to hear about Italy, so we met up after her French lesson and ended up getting coffee at a table that was in a bath tub! So that was interesting hahaha. To be honest, it was a pretty amazing place to drink a coffee and I am very glad that happened. I think Alessandra was a little embarrased to drink it there but I couldn’t have chosen a better spot, and we laughed about it quite a bit. Talking to Alessandra is both fun AND great French practice, and I feel lucky to get to spend a little time each week with such a lovely Italian girl. 

Later that same day, I met up with Jess and Maira to get even more coffee! It had been so long since I had seen Maira, and she was just as beautiful and bubbly and Brazilian as ever. We went to a cafe where you have to pay by the hour and can order whatever you want, and it was an interesting time! Afterwards, we sat by a fountain and told whatever silly stories we had been saving for each other, and it was wonderful. They are both just such hilarious and smiley people; definitely worth keeping around.

This weekend was a special one because Michael (my Belgian friend) and his good friend Christophe came to visit Paris. I had been looking forward to seeing Michael, meeting Christophe, and just showing them around in general since they had bought their tickets over a month before, and I woke up on Saturday morning enthusiastic about the task of picking Michael up at Gare du Nord. The plan was that Michael would arrive on Saturday morning, and since he had already seen Paris like four times, I would take him around to spots I liked and then the next day, Christophe would arrive and we would spend Sunday and Monday showing him all the touristy must-sees. 

I would like to say that the entire weekend was just this fantastic party time and that I loved every second, but that wouldn’t be the most honest thing to do hahah. You see, Michael was perfect, and Christophe was also perfect, it is just that I got very overwhelmed with the idea of trying to show them Paris as well as Michael had shown me Brussels, and I ended up partially ruining my whole weekend with my own anxiety. Ruined is a bit strong of a word actually, but I certainly put a damper on the experience. The worst was the first hour, when I was really trying to fight my stress and come up with ways to make Michael have a fabulous time, but after seeing how upset I was getting Michael completely took over and gave me the freedom to not choose what we were going to do. I was grateful for his kindness and understanding, because I really didn’t feel like I knew the city well enough to give him the day he had been looking forward to, but I didn’t feel a weight lifted from my shoulders. I felt dissapointed in myself, first of all for not knowing the best places in Paris, second of all for letting that stress me out, third of all for not being able to shake that stress off even though I knew it was useless, fourth of all for having an expressive face that made it clear that I wasn’t feeling as happy as I could have been, and fifth of all letting any of these things dissapoint me in the first place. Hahahah, I knowwww. These are silly things to get worked up about, I get it, but they really took a toll on me. These thoughts exhausted me throughout the whole weekend, and that plus lots and lots of walking resulted in me not being my absolute best self, and I wanted to be the best Sally possible so that their weekend would be unforgettable and splendid. 

So that was a bummer, but I am happy to report that it was more of a bummer for me than for Michael and Christophe, who seemed to have a pretty swell time. Before Christophe’s arrival, Michael got to see the Musee D’Orsay for the first time, and I was perfectly content to wander around in it once more. I also took Michael to my blogging cafe and Shakespeare and Co, both of which he seemed to enjoy and seeing that he was having a good time significantly calmed my useless anxieties. 

I had been very much looking forward to meeting this Christophe that Michael had told me so much about. The way Michael had spoken to me about Christophe made it clear that he had a very high opinion of this person, and since I have looked up to Michael for quite some time now, I couldn’t wait to meet him in person!

Aaaaand Christophe did not only meet whatever curious expectations I had imagined up about who Michael would keep around as a close friend, but exceeded them. He was quick witted and friendly and interested in a lot of things that I don’t care about (like cars because yes, you are a car guy, Tophe) and ridiculously good at keeping up conversations with his perfected posh British accent. Within the first half hour, I could see why Michael valued his opinions so much, but I was also overwhelmed by how curious he was to get to know me. Not just me, though, you know, because of course it couldn’t be that simple. He wanted to know my passions and my theories on love and how the gears in my mind work hahaha which YES, is exactly the kind of person I want to spend time with but it was a little difficult to answer in my exhausted state. We spent our time walking from tourist attraction to tourist attraction on pretty Parisian streets while Christophe asked me questions and Michael smiled and shook his head, knowing that only the craziest of answers would come out of my mouth. It was a weird weekend, but like, thank goodness it wasn’t a normal weekend! Right? 

Anyways, we saw lots of pretty things, and we ate some pretty good food. I live in Paris, so they were much more interesting to me than the actual city itself, and now that I am back at home and they are on a train back to Brussels, I miss them. Paris is so much quieter now! I need to go visit them before I leave because they really are such intriguing people. 

OH! Two cool little last things before I end this post: my postcard and Prune’s aging. 

I got a postcard from Anna (YES MY ITALIAN ANNA) this week and it made my heart melt with joy because I love her too much.

And Prune lost her second tooth, so that is exciting. 

She refuses to show the camera, though. 

Olivia

After already having gone through the experience of living in a foreign country for a year and, in the process, meeting many wonderful people who I knew I would have to leave at the end of that year, I am familiar with the bittersweet agony that comes with goodbyes. I have teared up in airports and train stations and I have hugged dear friends as tightly as possible at bus stops, knowing it would be my last chance to do so for awhile. I have murmured the words "it's not a 'goodbye', it's a 'see you later'!" to both myself and to others in multiple languages and I have repeated (and translated) wisdom stolen from Winnie the Pooh - that we are lucky to know people who making saying goodbye so hard. These thoughts certainly help, and in my experience, usually turn the actual moment into one rich with feelings of gratitude and I find myself laughing despite the tears. 

The bummer of saying goodbye finds a way to bother everyone at some point though, it seems. Oftentimes the weird/melancholy goodbye feeling doesn't come just from the knowledge that you won't see someone tomorrow or for a very long time, but from a combination of things, like the uncertainty of the future and/or the sensation that a piece of you will part with them. 

After being an exchange student, I know that the sorrows of goodbyes can feel unbearable at moments, especially when you look at a map and realize that there will be miles and kilometers and entire seas between you and someone you care for deeply, someone who has become a significant part of your year-long life abroad. 

The idea that you will most likely see your dear friends again can be some-what comforting, but it doesn't change the fact that something you love is ending. Your friendship will continue on, maybe even for the rest of your lives, but who you both are in that moment and in that country and what it all means to you makes up a little slice of reality that you will never be able to repeat. It takes some willpower to accept that something you aren't ready let go of -something that doesn't seem finished- is complete, and let it rest in your mind as a beautiful memory. 

 

Before leaving for my three weeks in Sicily, I had to say goodbye to Olivia, one of my closest friends in Paris. If you read my blogposts weekly (or somewhat weekly) you might remember her as the quirky British girl who can make me laugh almost as easily as Molly can. I named this post after Olivia because her decision to go back to the UK early is going to change a lot more things about my life in Paris than she realizes. Actually SAYING goodbye to Olivia wasn't painful; we spent a lovely last day roaming the little streets of Montmartre with Jess and cracking each other up. We found a Mexican restaurant and had some interesting burritos, took silly pictures, and exchanged entertaining stories about the children we all look after. The somber part of our goodbye hit me on the metro ride home, when I started thinking about all the ways that the lack of Olivia's physical presence would alter my remaining months in Paris. The day I had just spent with Olivia and Jess, wandering around Paris and laughing, was the last of its kind, and that didn't feel real. It was already a memory! I knew I would spend other days like that with Jess and Maira, but OLIVIA wouldn't be there. 

Olivia with her accent and silly words, always telling us to stop faffing around. Who could ever replace her? 

Olivia had to leave her job as an au pair in Paris early because of class she must take in London that is starting sooner than expected. She is excited to continue her studies, and Jess and Maira and I are excited for her, too, of course! And I know I will see her again. I could even see her before going back to the States! Even as I write this in Sicily, in the very south of Italy, there isn't even an entire Europe between Olivia and me hahaha. 

 

Olivia, I am glad you are going off to take important steps for your future, but I want you to read this and know how much you mean to me. This year has been tough for me at times, and I don't think you realize how much you have helped me. It makes sense that it wouldn't be obvious for you -- I haven't, like, cried on your shoulder or anything. We aren't close the way childhood friends are. I don't know your favorite ice cream flavor or how you take your coffee and I don't think I know any of your secrets, but I know what you meant to me during the time we spent together in Paris, and how much that will mean to me for the rest of my life. 

 You were a source of happiness that gave me something to look forward to. Our conversations constantly entertained me, and during times when I felt too sad to do the talking, hearing the things you and Jess and Maira would say to each other and your shared laughter was extremely comforting. 

Thank you for being open to our friendship, even after being a bit surprised by my forwardness when one of the first things I actually said to you was "want to be friends?!" Hahaha thank you for getting used to me even though they probably don't make Sallys like me where you come from! 

I won't miss you everyday; not even close.

 But I needed to write this blog post because I know that someday in the future, something is going to remind me of you or Jess or Maira or something any combination of the four of us shared in Paris, and I am going to be filled with a longing to slip back to where and who and what we were as we lived our simple au pair lives in France. And in this post, I am placing the biggest burden of my love on you because you are the first of us to leave! Ha! 

That is all, really. I wish you well, friend. :) 

Sicily III

Good news everyone: my last week in Sicily was much more exciting than the one before, so this blog post will probably be a lot more enjoyable to read! Hahaha. 

As I write this I am chilling on a lawn chair outside and enjoying my last hour of Italian sunshine before we head off to the airport to catch out plane back to Francia. These past three weeks have been such an interesting experience when I look back on them, almost like a mini Italian exchange hahaha. I have gotten used to spending hours alone with my thoughts, not having internet, hearing nothing but French (and sometimes Italian TV), and being stuck on top of a pretty mountain in the middle of nowhere, and I have to say it really isn't that bad! Don't get me wrong, I am very happy that I am going back to Paris this evening, but this little Sicilian vacation has succeeded in reminding me that a lot of things that I normally (and almost automatically) view as necessities are actually luxuries. I think that is probably a good thing to remember. :) 

Okay, so, what did I do this week? I watched a reality TV show! And it was incredibly realistic because it wasn't even on the TV at all. It was about four different French couples on a vacation in Sicily. The four different wives were all beautiful, well-dresses Parisian women and the men were laid-back, cultured, and always laughing. The four different couples all had very different personalities, but they had one thing in common: they just wanted to have a good time, and they wanted to do it in style. 

Being in Sicily with Fred and Cecile's friends was nothing like the two weeks before. I spent almost all my time with them, but honestly it was as if I wasn't even there! Most of the time I felt invisible, but I was okay with that. Sitting at the table and listening to them talk, I could still eat the delicious, best-of-the-best food that was served but it was as if I had slipped into a different life. I listened to the Parisian women chat about which perfume they were into at the moment, and I listened to their husbands joke about the traffic in Palermo compared to all the other countries they have been to. As a group, they repeatedly rolled their eyes and laughed lightly over shared inside jokes and stories.  I was glad to be invisible because I had nothing to contribute to these conversations, but that didn't make them uninteresting. During the week, we walked around downtown, ate at nice restaurants, spent some time at the beach, and visited places I had already been to the weeks before, but it was all so much different with the changed company. 

In the beginning of the week when I was addressed by anyone other than Cecile or Fred, it was clear to me that he or she didn't really know what to do with my presence. Was I the help? Was I to be treated as an intelligent human being by these clearly important people? It was actually comical. As the week progressed, I smiled and showed off the French I had learned since the last time I had seen them, in Normandy, my first month living in Europe, and I joined more conversations and played games with them. One night, I found myself drinking with them as if we were old buddies, as if they weren't all 20 years older than me, as if we had things in common. After that night, the majority of the friends realized they could smile at me or ask me questions or acknowledge my presence. The others, well, some of them clearly still thought the very point of my existence in this planet was to do their dishes, but I did my absolute best to be respectful and remember that I would never seem them again after a few days (and to keep my sarcastic comments in my head). In that sense, this past week was entertaining and eye-opening. Upon pushing my feelings to the side, I was able to study these people and how they treated each other in comparison to the strangers  they interacted with in public and, well, me. It was interesting to watch such charm rise and fall, niceties turn into condescension, and "thank you" be pronounced in so many different ways. Cecile and Fred have never treated me as anything less than Prune's fabulous and loving older sister, and seeing that some of their friends simply couldn't comprehend that gave me a whole new respect for my incredible host parents. 

The few pictures that I have of this past week are mostly of Prune, and I took them because I thought Cecile would be happy (she was)! Cecile was constantly running around, trying to find ways to make things perfect for her friends, and it was the least I could do! One day when we were exploring an older city, we discovered a staircase that led down to an ancient clothes-washing station! It was pretty cool. 

(During this meal a bird pooped on my plate, btw.)

I also tried my first Sicilian Connolo! 

OH. Also, since the house was packed with people, Prune and I were roommates hahaha and she was soooo stoked! She made a sign for our door and everything. Sleeping in the same room as Prune was kind of a nightmare because not only does she NEED music and lights to sleep, but she also snores. But, you know, she's cute anyways. :) Hahaha. 

In conclusion, my three weeks in Italy were strange as heck. I felt happy and lonely and angry and excited and confused and full-of-ice-cream and so many other things but I promise I never stopped feeling grateful. Grateful to know the people I know and to have been to the places I have been and for getting to learn so many things every single day, even if the lessons aren't always fun ones. I'm glad I came to Sicily and spent such a weird three weeks here. Someday I am going to see a picture of Mondello Beach and I am going to miss it, but for now I miss Paris, and I know that right when I get back I am going to miss California hahah. It seems that my life at this point has come to half loving where I am (no matter where I am) and half missing everywhere I am not. It's not even that the grass is greener! It's that different yards grow different flowers and I don't happen to have a favorite flower. I am in love with all of the flowers, but if I were to pick them and make a bouquet JUST FOR ME, then the flowers I love would be dead. You know? 

Gosh darn it life, you make me feel so many things. 

Okay blog readers, I need to stop now. Good bye, and see you next week. :D 

Sicily II

I can't believe it has been two weeks already. Seriously, it feels like I have only been here for four days! 

This post is not going to be very long because if I told you what I did every day, things would get quite repetitive. In the mornings we go to the beach. When we get home, we have a late lunch, and then Prune takes a huge nap and I read and then it is dinner time and we eat again and then we go to bed. Really! That is what I have done for the last several days hahaha. When I say it like that it doesn't sound super fun, and to be honest, it isn't the most EXCITING way to spend time, but things could definitely be much much worse. I mean, first of all, the beaches are beautiful. I described them in my last post, and when I get back to Paris to post this you will get to see pictures! Everything here is colorful, which I love. And the food is amazing, which I also love. And, since I have been here, I have read five and a half novels in French! That has to be great practice hahaha. 

The first half of this past week I spent alone with Nonno and Prune. A few times while Prune napped, instead of reading (or in Nonno's case, watching TV) we spent time cleaning the house in preparation for Cecile's arrival because she likes things to be CLEAN. 

The day before Cecile arrived, Nonno and Prune and I explored the ruins of a castle near the house, and that was pretty fun! 

Prune was sooooo happy to see Cecile when she arrived! She had missed her mamon. 

The rest of the week continued on as it had started except with Cecile here too. One day, we went furniture shopping instead of going to the beach! 

Since I have gotten a little tired of being on vacation, I use most of my energy trying to make it the best vacation ever for Prune. Together we explore the garden and make houses for the snails and we sing lots of songs. On the beach, we make lots of sandcastles and I have started teaching her how to swim. Prune LOVES the water! I keep telling Cecile that if Prune took swimming lessons where I worked as a lifeguard in California, she would no doubt be everyone's favorite student hahaha. She is fearless because the water means nothing but FUN for her, which is kind of stressful sometimes but seeing a kid be so happy fills my heart with joy. 

Today we had a big Sunday lunch with Nonno's close family. I hadn't seen them since Christmas when they all came to Paris, and it was nice to see them all again! During lunch, everyone spoke in Italian, and I was surprised by my ability almost completely follow the conversation! Upon realizing that I could understand Italian, some of them began to ask me questions, and I realized I had no way to respond! Being able to understand a language and not speak it was a whole new experience for me. It was different with French and Spanish because I was studying those languages as I began to understand them, and therefore I had some words to use when it came to responding. In Italian, I have hardly any words! It is kind of hilariously frustrating. We figured out that if I responded in slow Spanish, they could get the just of my responses, so I stuck with that for awhile. Sometimes I would use French verbs in my Spanish because I knew they would be more similar to their equivalents in Italian hahah. It was an interesting afternoon with lots of food. 

Now I am cuddled up in bed, safely tucked beneath my mosquito net, trying to finish up this blog post in the notes section of my phone. I don't feel homesick, but I would really like to be able to go online and send messages to friends and family just because I really like to talk to them. I want to send Michael a particularly interesting paragraph in an essay I read yesterday. I want to send my mom a little red Facebook messenger heart. I want to go read Molly's tweets and send her funny pictures of Prune. I want to send Caleb some random thought because I like it when he knows that I'm thinking about him. I also want to send Cherish a message. And Angela Green because I don't talk to her enough. 

I know too many great people and it is overwhelming sometimes but I am learning to cope. :) 

Goodnight world. 

 

Sicily I

I apologize, my dear blog readers, that you could not read this post sooner! As I type this post in the "notes" section of my internet-less iPhone, it is Sunday, April 24th and I have been in Palermo for just over a week. When I get back to Paris, I will email myself this post and finally be able to put it online for you lovely people to enjoy. Thank you for your patience!  

On Friday, April 15, Prune, Fred, Cecile, and I all woke up at 4am to drive across Paris so Prune and I could catch our early morning plane. Everything went smoothly in the airport. Prune was sleepy and hungry, but she really hustled though security and was sweet to all the flight attendants! It was pretty darn early in the morning, but of course I was thrilled to be catching a plane. I love airports, which you all must know by now, and it was an all knew kind of exciting to be taking a plane with a five year old who was just as enthusiastic about the whole experience as I was! During the two hour flight, Prune mostly watched a movie and I mostly read, but every quarter hour we couldn't help ourselves from chatting and day dreaming about all the things we would do when we got to Sicily. Prunette couldn't wait to build sand castles and see her grandpa, and I couldn't wait to feel the sunshine on my arms and eat gelato hahaha. The flight went by quickly, and before we knew it, we were being greeted at the exit of the airport of Palermo by Nonno, our Italian grandfather! 

Nonno drove us through Palermo and up the big hill to his house so we could drop off our things. My first impression of Sicily was greatly influenced by my shock of riding in the passenger seat in a car being driven through Italian traffic by a true Italian. So much honking and so little personal space! I am usually a bit nervous in cars, but I was honestly too distracted to pay attention to my nerves. How were the pedestrians so fearless? How did a two lane street become a 3 1/2 lane street? How had nobody crashed? I was entertained by this driving when I first arrived, and after being here for a week I have learned to gasp less every time a car swerves inches in front of us. 

Other than the crazy driving, my first memories in Sicily revolve around my joy at feeling the sun all over me as I rode in the front seat of Nonno's car. I had been soooo looking forward to not being cold, and in his car I was hot! I felt so grateful to be under the sun and beginning an adventure. 

That afternoon, we headed down to Mondello, the beach we have ended up going to almost every day! Just like we had dreamed on the plane, Prune and I made sandcastles and splashed in the water and when we were done playing, Nonno took us to get some gelato! 

It was a fine first day in Sicily and that night I slept happily under my mosquito net. 

The next morning, I got up early to go on a run. Nonno lives up on the top of a mountain, so I knew it would be a bit hilly, but that didn't really bother me. The hills didn't end up being a problem, BUT the dogs did. After only running for about three minutes I was excitedly greeted by a pack of stray dogs who thought that nipping at my ankles was a realllyyyy fun game hahaha. I was terrified, and I ran back up to the house and decided I would only run on the beach from then on. About an hour later, we had eaten breakfast and it was time to go to the beach! I brought my running stuff with me and that is how I have been able to get workouts in during this vacation. Here in Palermo, we mostly go to the beach in the mornings and the weather is perfect for running and not too hot as it would be if we were to go in the afternoon. That second afternoon in Sicily, Fred's parents arrived from the South of France and they stayed with us up until two nights ago (Friday the 22nd). 

Now, trying to blog on my phone is a rather frustrating task, so rather than reporting each and every thing we did over the last week, I am going to just talk about my experience here so far in general. 

With Fred's parents (Marie and Jean-Philipe), Prune and I got to do a lot of beach going AND exploring. We spent most mornings at the beach and most afternoons marveling at beautiful cathedrals and hill-top castles. Everyday at noon on the way home from the beach, we would stop and get fresh Sicilian sesame seed bread from the baker at the base of Nonno's mountain and it would make the car smell like heaven. Going to the beach and seeing the different Sicilian towns and cathedrals was nice, but one my favorite things about being here so far is getting to enjoy the nature that I have seen here during the car rides that is like nothing I have seen before. The mountains look like jagged sandy rocks speckled with super green trees, and at the bases of the mountains are huge patches of forests and vineyards that surround different groups of dusty orange apartments and houses. When you drive through the city, the streets are so small and you can hear all sorts of people yelling incomprehensible Italian sentences from the hundreds balconies that rule the lower skies. And the beach! Oh my goodness. The water is transparent and such a magical color of blue that fades to green and then to a lighter blue and then a darker blue off in the distance. Palermo is a painting and my eyes don't want to look away! 

Nonno's house is another thing I should blabber about. It is perfect for Prunette! There is a huge garden with a slide and a tree with a swing and from the top floor of the house there is an exquisite view of the valley below. And Nonno has been so hospitable! He makes us delicious things to eat for every meal and for dessert there is plenty of almond cookies and fresh fruit. The oranges here are to die for. 

Since there is no internet in this house up in the mountains, I have had lots of time to read and daydream. This has been both a blessing and a curse. I would like to say it has been refreshing to not be able to communicate with those who aren't only a few feet away, but to be honest it has made me feel a bit homesick. I don't know if homesick is the right word, actually. You could say it has made me feel lonely, maybe. I haven't been able to talk to anyone who isn't a host-grandparent or a five year old for a week, and I miss partaking in conversations that make me feel alive and passionate and interested. Don't get me wrong, these grandparents are all lovely people, and Prune is a sweetheart, I have just missed being able to share my thoughts with people who will listen to them and respond with enthusiasm and curiosity. The good thing about not having internet is that I have been forced to speak almost ONLY in French and Italian since I arrived. Of course I still speak to Prune in English, but unless I am talking to her I am practicing other languages, which is fantastic! 

Today on the beach, however, I had a bit of a language mix up. An Italian news reporter snuck up on me with a microphone and before I knew it there was a camera in my face and questions were being asked to me in Italian. I then heard myself say "I'm sorry! I don't speak English!" in French! Hahahaha. The reporter looked so confused! We eventually worked out that he understood English and I understood some Italian, so he asked me a couple questions in Italian about the beach and I responded in English that he could translate later. What a Sally moment! 

I am getting very sleepy as I type this post out, but before I fall asleep there is one more EXTREMELY important thing to tell you about! Prune got her first wiggly tooth here in Palermo and proceeded to lose it on the fourth day of our trip! Watching her push the wiggle tooth around with her tongue made me shiver with disgust hahaha but I did my best to look as excited as possible, because I remember how enchanting the idea of the tooth fairy was as a kid! When Prune's tooth fell out, I told her about how I used to write letters to the tooth fairy, so Prune drew a picture and then dictated which I wrote to the tooth fairy for her (which in France isn't a fairy but a little mouse). That night after Prune had gone to sleep, the grandparents and I got together and constructed a letter to Prune from the Petite Souris and drew a picture of a little mouse on it because we knew she would love that. We put it in an envelope with some coins and then exchanged it with the envelope Prune had put under her pillow. 

It was so cute watching the grandparents getting so into the spirit of entertaining Prunette's imagination! Usually, I feel like a part of the family, but there are moments where I feel like an outsider with the special opportunity to study a bunch of family members tending to the Fred-Cecile-Prune family as if it were a garden. Fred and Cecile were worried when Prune's tooth was loose because they didn't know if she was too young or not, and all the grandparents were worried about how many hearts to put in the letter from the French Mouse Tooth Fairy and all of this worry was out of the great amount of love they have for Prunette. My parents and grandparents must have gone through similar things when I was small, and I feel lucky to be able to see what it is like from a perspective that is neither fully adult nor little child, but somewhere in between.

Prune was fascinated the next morning. Fascinated that the tooth fairy really existed and had found her all the way in the south of Italy! You could tell she was proud of herself, and you could tell the grandparents were proud of pulling the whole thing off. I was just happy to witness all of this, really hahaha. The au pair perspective is sure an interesting one!