Friday, January 31, 2014

Family

In my last blog post I talked about the solutions I have been trying to make to my problems. I thought that I had mostly fixed my situation by talking to my counselor, but it turns out things are a lot more serious than that. I still don't want to write in depth about the problems I have had, but it is necessary for you to know that I am in serious danger of being sent home. It has been an emotional week, and I am still very nervous, but I know that whatever happens I am going to be okay. 
I have always considered myself to be on great terms with my host family. I have felt so close to them my entire exchange and have always been so grateful for what they have done for me. Yesterday, i sat down with my host parents and asked them about what I should do or what had gone wrong. While talking about the problems, the truth spilled out that they had not been very pleased with me as an exchange student. I felt awful hearing this and immediately wanted to know what I had done wrong and how I could make it better. I asked them for a second chance, to let me show them that I am a good daughter and that I am so happy to have them as parents, and they saw my sincerity and gave me that second chance. I am not a rule breaker, and I do not need second chances often, but I could feel such love in the way they forgave me after I had unintentionally hurt them. I had no idea that our relationship had distanced itself so much, but now looking back on things I realize that things have changed between us. I decided that I was going to become a better daughter and exchange student without really understanding how. They had told me that I had changed and that they missed the girl they had met when I arrived in the airport, so I decided I would be everything she was and more. I didn't think I had changed that much, but what mattered more than my opinion was that I show them who I really am. I began project "New Sally" two days ago, and these two days have been absolutely amazing. 
I have gotten up early to go to the farmers market with my dad and gone out to eat cafe helados with him. I have cuddled my host mom and watched telenovelas with her in Mexican Spanish which now sounds so foreign! I have confided in them at the table about how nervous I am about being sent home, and listened to their advice and let them comfort me. They have even gone out of their ways to help me out with Rotary. My dad helped me write an email telling them about our new relationship and my mom has made a lot of phone calls. This evening I went on a long night walk with my mom and we talked for ages about everything we had both gone through and it felt so good to share how I felt with such a loving person. 
So really, even with these two perfect days, I am still in the same trouble and tight position with Rotary, but I feel different now. I want to finish my exchange more than I can express in words, but because of these past two days, there are other things for me to focus on that matter a lot to me too. I have been reassured beyond any doubt that I am part of a strong family here. This family, even after having secret problems for so long, forgave me and gave me a second chance when they had no idea if I deserved one or not. They are here for me when I need them with love and support and I could never thank them enough. I asked my dad how they could do this for me and he looked at me and said,"parents will always be mad at their children at times, but they never stop loving them and there is always forgiveness. And that's how we see you too, Sally. You're our daughter."

I don't know where I will be next week. I don't know if I will be back in the US, living with another family in Chile, or still waiting to know what my future is to be. But I do know that I have a family here who loves me and a family in the US loves me. I know that this experience has made me stronger and brought us closer than we might have ever been if there weren't any problems. So whether or not Chilean rotary gives me a second chance to represent my country and continue my exchange, I know that I have changed in the minds and hearts of the people who matter most to me here, and that is something to smile about. 

Muchas gracias, mis papas amorosos de Chile. Los quiero más que nada. :)

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Iffy Situations

As some of you may or may not know, I have been having a few problems over here in Chile. Some of them are pretty serious, but I have talked to a lot of people and gotten a lot of help and I am glad to report that everything will be okay. 
What I would rather focus on, other than what these problems actually are, is how I have accepted my situation and gotten through them. If there is one thing that exchange does for you, it makes you stronger and very independent, and I am feeling a lot of that right now. This past week has been very emotional for me, but I have been able to take deep breaths and figure things out when all I wanted to do was Skype my mom and cry. I have chosen, after much thought, that being happy is still the best thing I can do! I don't want to waste my exchange with negative thoughts. I want to be happy, so I will be. 
My entire exchange up to this point, I have honestly tried to be the best exchange student I could be. I have smiled, made friends, and been nice and outgoing and positive. It seems, however, that even while trying my hardest, I have made a few mistakes that have offended some Chileans in ways I could never have imagined. Rather than hoping they can accept that my culture prevented me from realizing my errors, I plan to apologize whole-heartedly, and then go on being Sally with just a bit more caution. I am so grateful to be in this country and experiencing all these experiences, and I understand that it's my job to adjust to this Country, not their job to adjust to me. 
This week I have also learned how many people are here for me. Some of them are here for me on Skype, one of them is downstairs in my parents bedroom, and one of them is ready to take the train an hour to see me at a moments notice to take me out and eat sushi and bring me "I'm sorry you're having a bad day" chocolates (I love Evan so much). I have received various Facebook messages and phone calls checking to see if I am doing okay. It's funny how I never realized how many people cared to ask how I am doing until my answer was anything other than "I'm doing fantastic!"
I send a thousand "THANK YOU"s to eveyone who has been here for me. More than anything, I want to thank the Lorenzini family. Franco's mom, Claudia, heard about my problems and immediatly insisted I come visit her family for a while. I am currently writing this blog entry while laying out in the sun by her pool and listening to her adorable little boys laugh and play. Today marks one year since Franco's accident, and I love the idea that I am spending it at Franco's house! In this moment, I am completely at peace with the world. The sky is blue and I am in Chile with amazing people and my exchange less than half over. My problems are temporary and will pass over soon and everything will be okay, which essentially means everything is okay right now. I love life and I love all of you as well. 

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Another Summer Post

This past week I have been focusing a lot on hanging out with my Chilean friends as possible, and it has totally worked out! I can't remember which days were which for the life of me, but I can remember some of the fun things I did. 
One day I went over to Francesca's house with Diego. We swam with her little cousins and it was so nice to play with little kids again! We made a whirlpool in the jacuzzi and played other water games. In the pool, her cousins would swim up and cling on to me to breath and it reminded me so much of swimming with Stella! 
After swimming, we went on a really long evening bike ride and stopped in a near by town for some ice cream. It was such a pleasant day! 
Another day I went swimming with the girls in my class. I had missed them so much and it was so great to finally hangout all together again! 
A few days ago I went with some friends to a skate competition in our city. There were live bands playing and I was laughing really hard because these bands had attempted to compose songs in English but they just turned out really akward and hilarious. I had a very nice time hanging out in the grass with my friends and enjoying the warm afternoon. 

That's all I really did this week! I also met the new exchange student from South Africa who is living in Rancagua. Since he is our newbie, Alex, Katie, Katie, and I are going to show him everything and make him feel super welcome. I am so excited that he is here and I want him to have a fantastic exchange! His name is Nicolo and he likes sports like I do, which is awesome, and I just can't wait to get to know him better. He speaks English that I can hardly understand and has fascinating stories about his home country. 

That's all for now! Bye!









Monday, January 13, 2014

Summer Time

Its so hot, guys. Actually, I think Ukiah is hotter durning the summer, but since there isn't air conditioning here anywhere but in cars, I'm usually melting as I push on through my Chilean exchange. Since it's summer, my days all sort of run together and I have given up trying to distinguish which day it is. This wouldn't bother me except that it has turned out to be a habit that makes for sloppy blogging. Oh well.  I'm sorry. I hope you guys will continue loving me anyways. Hehe. :)
Most of my days start off the same way: I get up, workout, shower, eat breakfast, and then either read, write, or play ukulele until it is time to eat lunch with my dad. My dad always makes interesting lunches for me. Sometimes they scare me, but instead of being offended by the faces I try not to make, he seems to be entertained as he watches me try to choke down suspicious looking sea food and turkey hearts. Once you learn to not think about what you are eating you would be amazed at the things you can manage to stomach! 
After lunch is when I usually have plans with friends. I try to hang out with my Chilean friends as often as possible in order to practice speaking Spanish (and also because I love them and they are all beautiful and amazing), but when they are busy, I make plans with the other exchange students. When I hang out with exchangers, I always try to speak to them in Spanish. I feel awful when I talk in English because I know that this my be one of the most Spanishy years I will ever get to live! When it comes to choosing to hang out with my exchange family or my Chilean friends, I will always choose Chileans because that's what I came to Chile for, but when it comes to sitting on my room or hanging out with exchangers, well, the choice is an easy one to make. 
Evan takes the train to Rancagua to visit me a lot. We meet up with AFS kids, cook food, or hang out in the mall and keep eachother company. Evan wants to be a politician someday so he knows a lot about politics in the US and is trying to get me to know more about my country. He sends me a lot of articles to read to help me be more worldly and aware. I could go on and on about how happy I am to have him as one of my greatest friends here hahaha. He is the coolest. 
One of Evan and my new favorite people to hang out with is Sarah, a girl from Texas. She is funny and athletic and wants to be a chef someday, but also knows a ton about politics. These people are brilliant, really. You all would be lucky to meet them!




Sunday, January 5, 2014

AÑO NUEVO EN CHILE

This past week I got to begin the beautiful year 2014 with my amazing Chilean friends and family! The Chilean New Years tradition is to eat a big feast with your family and then stay up together until the clock strikes midnight. At midnight, every single person in the family hugs every other single person no matter how many people there are! I hugged all my Chilean family tight and wished them all happy New Years and it really felt like I was with family! After this takes place, the young people are all given permission to go spend the rest of New Years with their friends, so that's what I did! I went to my friend Carolina's house with a bunch of other friends and we celebrated the beggining of my last year living in Chile. 
Later in the week, my friends Evan and Nikita came over to my house to make Indian food. Nikita is like some sort of master Indian chef so Evan and I were super excited. We made her nachos to give back, but they were nothing next to the butter chicken she made! I still have leftovers in my fridge and my family is enjoying them hahaha. 
Since it's summer, it's hard for me to remember the days of the week so it's harder to write detailed blog posts. Either way, I am having a fantastic summer and 2014 is already awesome!